One of the biggest obstacles to being successful and happy in life is that every time you log on to Facebook or LinkedIn, there is some smartarse posting uplifting messages of a positive kind, designed to remind you how far short of perfect your life is and making your existence seem worthless by comparison with their lofty sentiments.
Today, I want to show you a way to end the misery of this remorseless wisdom. I’m not going to “empower” you or make you “passionate” about life. I’m not going to “share the secret of success” with you. Instead I’m going to introduce you to the power of negative thinking. Simply put, Negative Thinking is about shouting aloud “bullshit” every time someone tries to put you down with one of their little homilies.
Take, for example, Michelle Obama: “Success isn’t about the money you make, it’s about the difference you make.” This is the statement of a rich middle-class woman, bellyaching about a first world problem. Michelle, if you haven’t got any money, then you haven’t got a place to sleep or a job. Success is about having enough money to stay alive in the middle of winter and to buy food at the supermarket.
In Maslow’s hierarchy of needs ‘making a difference’ comes in the top segment -after physiological needs, safety and security, love and belonging, and self-esteem. Try getting those without any money, Michelle, and you’ll soon find the police moving you along from your park bench.
So how do we convey this complex concept to the First Lady? Simple: you shout out loud “Bullshit Michelle” and then carry on doing things your way.
Or take Eckhart Tolle: “Stress is caused by being here but wanting to get there.” What? I live near Portsmouth but my clients are in London, you twat. I can stay here and remain poor or I can travel to them and pay the rent each month. “Bullshit Eckhart Tolle.”
Or what about “”That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” Eh? What about being kicked in the head by an iron boot that severely damages my cognitive functions? “Bullshit, Friedrich Nietzsche”.
Remember: Negative Thinking is the route to nowhere, the cure for nothing, and isn’t the antidote to life. But it’s not bullshit – and that’s worth a lot.